The Courier

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source: The Courier

The spoilers will only appear in the last paragraph, so feel free to read until then, if you want to. Actually the spoiler will contain a comparison to another movie, just so you know. But lets look at the movies cast for second first. You have Jeffrey Dean Morgan who made a name of himself with the Watchmen (and his appearance in the Shutter Island I guess). Now he either missed out on opportunities after that or didn't get offered better roles I suppose. Whatever it is, he is not alone in this movie. Miguel Ferrer, whom most might remember from the TV show 24, but some might remember from his straight to video days in the 90s is there with some other familiar faces (more of that later on). And while they're all pretty decent and the pace is strolling along quite nice, this is not a revelation. Not really bad by any standards either. And here come the spoilers: The main bad guy who isn't revealed until the end, is easy to spot. I recognized his voice instantly. We are talking about ... Mickey Rourke of course. But when I say main bad guy, you obviously having seen the movie (or not caring), should know that he actually isn't. The Keyser Soze moment isn't really bad, but it doesn't really elevate the movie either.

A Courier (Jeffrey Dean Morgan) is tasked with delivering a package to a crime boss (Mickey Rourke) thought to be dead. Hilarity ensues. "Yeah, I Watched This Movie". That's the attitude I had when "The Courier" reached its conclusion. We have seen this type of movie before, often, and we have had more fun at the expense of a larger budget. But like so many other movies nowadays, we feel a bit let-down when the screen goes black. Jeffrey Dean Morgan, an exceptional actor who never seems to be the right fit for his character, does the best he can with what he has. His character wakes up in a crummy apartment infested with mice. He uses superglue to fix a nasty cut. Yet despite all this self-loathing, he has good friends and family that he cares about. What's with that? The female lead is bizarre. Her hairstyle makes it appear as if her follicles are desperate to escape from her scalp, and considering how bad it is, I can't blame it for trying. She also has an unnecessary dubbing-over occasionally when she speaks. Perhaps they shot the film and forgot to record her at places. Mickey Rourke and Til Schweiger, the other draws on the cover, are under and wrongly used. Rourke's head is only visible for the first half of his scenes, the latter's introduction is corny. Schweiger's bodyguard hasn't ever seemed to have used a fire arm before, let alone in a movie. An odd assortment of has-beens and ne'er-do-wells fill out the rest of the cast. Lily Taylor and Miguel Ferrer play a Team Rocket type pair of villains who never say much besides grunts and gunshots. Mark Margolis, the definitive "that guy!" of actors plays Morgan's dad, or something. I'll give you one guess as to his fate. "Yeah, I Watched That Movie." That is what I will say to people when they ask if I have seen "The Courier". And it might take me a minute to remember exactly what they are talking about.